I ain't gonna live forever.

I was so surprised...my random ideas could become an actual plan for my real life after college.

Well, if you didn't already know this, I'm graduating this May. I recently made the decision not to pursue a major in Spanish, due to the fact that I would be ridiculously stressed this semester with the completion of my education classes AND my Spanish capstone. So, there goes my second trip to Spain. I'm bummed, for sure, but I made a choice that should benefit my mental health.

So anyway, with this in mind, I've been thinking a lot about my future: where I want to live, what I want to do with my classroom, etc. Oddly enough, I think I have the basics all figured out already. And I am extremely excited about it, so I decided to document a little for you.

With regards to the where, well, I do not want to be in Mesa. I know that if I even start out here, just to make it easier on myself, I'm gonna end up stuck here forever. I settle too easily. So I knew I had to get a plan going, figure out where I want to live. For some reason, I got hooked on the idea of Oregon. Why? I really don't know. But I did a whole lot of research one day, and I began getting really, really excited about it. It actually started to sound like a place I could want to live.

And so, my mother began spreading the word, as mothers do, and we've gotten nothing but positive feedback. I just think about it and I'm happy. I'll be setting off on my own, starting my own life, on my own two feet. It's insane, and I'm terrified, but I can't wait for next summer to get here!

Granted, I have a TON of work to do to make this a reality, and more research to do (anyone know anything about Bend? I've been recommended to that city...), but I don't like to worry about the little details until I have to. So, packing and moving, finding an apartment, finding a summer job, finding a teaching job, and getting silly things like furniture all take a back seat to my grand plans to move to a completely different state and start up a life for myself--away from everyone I know.

It's crazy. Why am I so bent (ha) on being completely independent? Where the heck did I get this trait? Regardless, it's clear that I have some insane notion that I need to be independent, and there's nothing I can really do about it but hope that someone is making sure I think things through enough before totally changing my life.

My mom, I'm pretty sure, would prefer I live closer, at least at the beginning of real life, so she can help me out a little (and she told me this yesterday, actually). But even she's said that she agrees that it would be difficult for me to "get away" once I start to settle in down here. And I'm sure some friends and family won't be too thrilled with me, but, in the immortal words of Bon Jovi, "it's my life, and it's now or never." So I hope you can all understand and use your frustrated energy to help me prepare myself. ;]

Hopefully this all pans out, because I really hate abandoning my own plans...but I guess I'll just have to wait and see.

UPDATE: I also think I may try to establish a RIF (Reading is Fundamental) program at the school I move to...but that'll take a little more time than simply moving and getting a job, oy.